Paradise Lost Abridged! Book One, Part Three: If You Want Jam, Make It Yourself

Paradise Lost Abridged! Book One, Part Two: On The Fiery Lake

Paradise Lost Abridged! Book One, Part One: Prologue

Introducing the new project from Buried Alive. "Paradise Lost," the greatest epic poem ever composed in the English Language gets a make-over and becomes a four panel comic strip.

"I think literature will be angry with you for this, Will"
"Awesome!"

Interlude: A Dickerdoodle Comic

Yeah, so this was my submission to the Penny Arcade "Dickerdoodle09" contest.  Now, I believe that the contest asked for "pictures" of "people" eating/making/enjoying "dick shaped cookies," which I interpreted to mean "a comic" of "cartoons" eating/making/enjoying "dick shaped cartoon cookies."  I personally think it should win just based on that fact that it rocks.  Also it took a long time to make.  Honestly though, I don't really care if it wins or not (though its rejection might lead to google map searches of the houses of both members of Penny Arcade). I just wanted to send something they've probably never gotten before in a photo contest ... since it's not a photo.

Note: This isn't a numbered strip because it will never be published in Ka Leo and is an apocrypha of sorts.

The 21st Century Grimoire

More thoughts on Sarah Palin's "Going Rogue."

A hint on how I feel about it: a "Grimoire" is a book of magic used by witches to summon hell-spawn and the like. Imagine your chemistry textbook, but replace "mix in Sodium Hydroxide and stir until solution turns blue" with "mix in twelve pints of The Blood of Innocents until cauldron simmers and smells of roasting hair follicles."  Seriously; that book is evil ... and really, really funny.

"Double, double, toil and trouble,
Fire burn and Cauldron bubble."

94. Gratz!

Ah yes, the end of a semester brings such mixed feelings.  Relief at the thought of a few weeks sans studying, dread at the thought of Holiday hours at your part-time retail job, more dread at the thought of all the money you don't have for all the gifts you must purchase for not you.  And of course, for all you lucky graduates, that feeling of "holy crackle pops, what the heck am I supposed to do now?"  Well good luck with that.  Us BFA hopefuls still have oodles of credits to take.  Thank God.

93. Operation: Christmas Dangerous

92. Skynet: At Least It's Not Rail

Okay, so this is another one for the students of UH Manoa.  ASUH organized a rally at the state capitol earlier today to protest budget cuts to UH Manoa (which are disproportionately higher than the cuts to the rest of the UH system like the community colleges) despite the fact that Manoa is the only campus which showed an increase in enrollment from the previous fall.
Naturally I would have gone to this rally, but I was in class... along with almost every other student... actually the Tuesday before finals week in the middle of the day is probably one of the worst times to hold a rally downtown and this showed when only, like, fifty kids showed up (or so I'm told).  Good for Mark Ing (ASUH President) for trying, but really? Too little, WAY too late.
Oh yeah, I guess some of you might not be familiar with "Rail."  It's interesting when more people in Hawai'i know what "Skynet" is, than "Rail."  And by interesting I mean depressing.  Anyway, "Rail" is the nickname for the Honolulu High-Capacity Transit Corridor project which would create an above ground mass transit system built on steel rails that (in it's initial stage) would link the Honolulu International Airport to Ala Moana.  I actually support rail (though again, it's too little, WAY too late), but the project has come under a great deal of fire for it's expense and the question of whether it's really necessary (although most commuters will tell you that it should have happened decades ago when the rest of the country did it and when we would have had federal funding to help).  There's a lot of people who seem to think rail is literally the devil.  So I guess this comic is sort of for them too.
Enjoy.
-Will

91. Warning: May Contain Weapons

Ah, late-night Safeway runs.  Out of such an imbecilic idea must spawn numerous other imbecilic ideas.  In fact, you inspire so many imbecilic ideas that one of them is sure to be coherent enough for a comic!

90. Continuity Issues

Hey kids, Harold, Zane and the rest of the "Morons" are back to their usual, non-centipedal shenanigans.
Btw, Harold is, in fact, wearing the "Photoshop Hero" T-shirt from Penny Arcade.  I'm hoping that by acknowledging it's origins here, they won't ask me to take it down.  I've emailed them to make sure it's cool, but to my complete shock, I've received no reply.
Jeeez, you'd think they were famous or something! What d'they have their own flippin' expo or something like th - oh... what's that? PAX is a Penny Arcade Expo? Well I'll be a fruit-fucker prime!

The End

Well that raps up the centipede chronicles. I'm fresh out of material. Thanks for reading. I hope you laughed, cried, raged, sighed and became severely dehydrated just as much as I did from this experience.

What's that? You're sad that it's all over? Well don't sob too much because...

"The Sun Also Shines on the Moronic" will remain in full color for as long as my WACOM holds out!

So... you know... that's something, then, in't?

89. In Our Darkest Nightmares: Aftermath